Antoinette Francher-Donald worried when her 17-year-old, newly licensed daughter didnappt immediately let her know she safely arrived at practice app a message that was delayed because of a traffic stop.
Once mother and daughter reconnected at home, the teen started bawling while explaining a police officer pulled her over to let her know the carapps lights were off.
appAs a Black youth, she has seen scenarios of Black youth and Black men, Black women, not coming home alive, and she was frightened for her life,app Francher-Donald said. appAs a parent, thatapps really, really, really hard because we have these conversations with our kids, as Black parents: appKeep your hands on the wheel. Make sure you donappt move. Make sure you do tell them anything that you have with you.app
appWe have it very early with our kids, much earlier than most. I donappt even know if white parents have them with their kids.app
Such family discussions should be easier now because of a Fort Wayne Urban League initiative Francher-Donald is participating in with other local women app Mothers for the Movement: Every Child Home Alive.
The effort seeks to educate youth about proper protocols when interacting with police.
Since the initiative was first publicized in July, members have developed guidelines for youth to follow when stopped by the police, and they recorded an educational video Tuesday.
appWhat the Mothers for the Movement has done so far is give us some language of how to have the conversation in a way that someone can receive the information, and weappre all on the same page with the delivery,app said Aisha Arrington, Urban League president and CEO.
Recent police-action shooting fatalities underscore the importance of the work.
Seven people app including those ages 16 and 22 app have been killed in Allen County this year by Fort Wayne, New Haven and county police officers as of Thursday. In multiple cases, Fort Wayne police have said the individuals who were shot failed to obey orders from law enforcement. In more than one case, those individuals had guns or one nearby.
Tracy Davis, a mother who wrote about the initiative in a Dec. 14 op-ed published in app, said Fort Wayne has faced unimaginable challenges this year.
appWeappve seen gun violence claim the lives of our youth far too soon. Weappve witnessed police-involved shootings hit alarmingly close to home,app Davis wrote. appThese events weigh heavily on our hearts, reminding us of the fragility of life and the urgency of change.app
Arrington stressed before filming began Tuesday that the initiative wasnappt prompted by a single police-action shooting but addresses discussions about police that families were already having.
appWeappre trying to help simplify this so parents and youth could get it,app she said. appWeappre doing our part to de-escalate something before it even ever begins.app
Arrington, a mother of three, said the work wasnappt easy. Some mothers pushed to focus on police to change before asking youth to change app a disagreement that involved difficult conversations.
appIt really came down to either educating our kids, which comes natural to a mother,app she said, appor trying to create systematic change, which a lot of it we donappt have control over.app
Intentional guidance
The Urban League is now promoting three key words for young people to follow during police interactions app stop, show and stay. Arrington said she hopes the refrain becomes as ingrained as the fire safety instructions of appstop, drop and roll.app
Francher-Donald said young people donappt necessarily need to remember the specifics behind the words app stop your car, your motor and your movements; show your hands, your ID and respect; and stay calm, stay put and stay alive. Giving teens an abbreviation that prompts them to pause is whatapps important.
appIf I know SSS means for me to pause, it will help me to stop,app she said.
Arrington emphasized the intention behind the recommended protocols, which were developed through research. Such efforts included reading books and ACLU of Indiana literature, meeting with community leaders and consulting with the Fort Wayne Police Department.
Capt. Jeremy Webb thanked the Urban League for approaching the department to start discussions focusing on cooperation. He said by email that knowing how to behave during police interactions app and knowing which actions are legal and illegal app is important.
appCooperation is a necessity and prevents further escalation,app Webb said. appThe more avenues this message is heard from, the better.app
Mothers for the Movement purposely avoided the word appcomplyapp because the language likely wouldnappt be well received by the community the protocols were created to help, Arrington and Francher-Donald said.
appWeappre always told that weappre not compliant,app Francher-Donald said, appand if we were compliant, life would be equitable.app
Arrington agreed.
appAll the burden is on the Black and brown person to comply, and if only we were complying, we wouldnappt find ourselves in these situations app which we know isnappt true,app Arrington added.
The protocols arenappt meant to place the responsibility on the people representing racial minorities, Francher-Donald said. Rather, she said, encouraging individuals to stop, show and stay should reduce the likelihood of police interactions escalating to more serious situations, such as being charged with a misdemeanor for refusing to provide identification. appWe are here to say we know that can stop an escalation, perhaps,app Francher-Donald said. appWe are here to keep our young people alive.app
Humanizing others
About 10 people, including three young people, visited the Urban Leagueapps offices on Hanna Street on Tuesday to participate in an educational video about the stop, show, stay protocols.
Garry Hamilton, a former Fort Wayne police chief, said he readily agreed. As he waited for his turn in front of the camera, he said he planned to reiterate the appstop, show, stayapp message. He noted those with concerns about a police interaction can later file a complaint with internal affairs.
appAn officer, they want to go home safe, and you want to go home safe, so letapps comply,app said Hamilton, who is Black and now a special crimes investigator with the Allen County prosecutorapps office.
Mothers for the Movement wanted the video to reflect various perspectives so people from different backgrounds could hear each otherapps voices and humanize each other, Francher-Donald said.
appWe have to humanize police, but we have to humanize our community, too,app Arrington said. appIf they go into a situation already fearful, like Antoinetteapps daughter, we got to do something about that.app
Francher-Donald noted her daughterapps affluent socioeconomic status doesnappt protect her from feeling afraid during traffic stops and added those feelings are shared throughout the Black and brown community, regardless of income level.
appAll of our young people deserve to live to 90 to 100 years old,app Francher-Donald said. appIf this is one of the pathways that I can be a part of, Iappm going to use my voice to do that.app
